KW

THE SPY-BRATOR

A Spr-brator?? (Raises right eyebrow), – but why?

Whatever happened to the good old “find whats available in your kitchen” type vibe? Pleasuring one’s self just got serious – technologically speaking.

A London-based technology company will be releasing the world’s first “spy-brator” – a super advanced sex toy which will collect information from women as they experience orgasms.

But why must we know every intimate detail of our big O’s? Mystery Vibe, a British start-up, hopes to help women climax on another level! Leaving Mr. Right, right outside.

This internet-connected sex toy gather’s data as the user bring’s themselves to climax. For women who have a difficult time experiencing an orgasm, the Spy-brator will be able to suggest different ways to get you in the mood based on what does it for other women.

For example, data on the most pleasurable patterns will be collected and distributed in a list of “trending vibes”. The information it collects will be used to make sure users’ six motors transmit only the most pleasing vibrations, “Hey Sally I saw you were trending on Supersonic! How did it work out for you?.”

Sensors in the Crescendo are able to collect data such as temperature change, pressure from muscle contractions, device positioning and blood flow, which will help us to understand both male and female orgasms.

The sex toy can be bent into shape and features six motors which can be controlled with an iPhone app, allowing users to hit exactly the right spot, “Bill is calling” – aaannnd loses orgasm.